Monday, December 1, 2008

it's happening...

Unfortunate for most parents must be the onset of the "terrible two's".  And it has started for us.  Creeping into our daily life are fits of disappointed crying sessions and an overuse of the word "myself".  Yesterday I was at my patience's end.   Today, however, has been much better.  Staying connected to the Lord seems to be pivotal in maintaining my internal peace and,  consequently, the peace in our home.  As I watched Amia demanding to do something by herself, I thought about the commentary it was regarding my life.  Though my mirror is only 30 inches tall, it reflects my heart uncomfortably accurate.  Even amidst situations that should cause me to depend entirely on God, I still find myself struggling to surrender... I mean really surrender.  In parts is one thing; in entirety is something completely different.  And God has been calling me to deal with areas of my life that I hold back from Him.  There are things I don't want to change... it's just too familiar... too comfortable.

But that is not what He has called us to, is it?  Hold me accountable - I plan to wrestle with God this week.

"I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands."  Psalm 119:10